Shootenanny

I think we all know what's about to happen here...

Know Your Pocomoke

Hope everyone had a merry Christmas! Hock N' Blog returns to full time action with this week's KYP:

1. In which U.S. city did Matt and Richard once start a house fire? Coincidentally, this occurred during the same trip that the game "Hot Pants" was invented.

2. Speaking of road trip disasters, name the city where a street prophet named Alphonso once climbed into the car with us to share his views on police brutality.

3. Who instigated the Great Fruitcake Debacle of 1998?

4. Who would win in a fight to the death, a large (but non-venomous) king snake or a feisty 10 week old kitten?

(Answers to be revealed soon.)

Magic Baguette

Funny French Bread! - The most popular videos are a click away

Traveler's IQ

Here's a fun game to test your knowledge of geography. I got up to level 11, but didn't have enough points for 12. Sometimes the hardest part is figuring out where these cities are without natural features to guide you (Russia and Canada are hard). We have a pretty well traveled group of friends, so write in your scores (unless you're too embarrassed).

Lolcats

I would like to congratulate Tom on his excellent copy and paste skills. However, he neglected to post the picture that started it all:
Here are a few more notable examples for those unfamiliar:
Or my personal favorite:

LOLMATTZ: A Primer

Ol' Bear was mighty confused when this picture recently popped up on your favorite blog.



It appears that he missed out on 2006's mildly amusing viral internet hit: lolcatz. It's hard to believe he missed this trend... I mean, the only way you could miss it is if you spent much of the year out of the country!

But I digress...

Per Wikipedia - Lolcats are images combining photographs of animals, most frequently cats, with a humorous and idiosyncratic caption in broken English (also known as Kitteh apparently). These images usually consist of a photo of a cat with a large caption.

Common themes include jokes of the form "Im in ur noun, verb-ing ur related noun."[11] "I has a noun" pictures show a cat in possession of an object while "Invisible noun" show pictures of cats apparently interacting with said invisible object.[11] "My noun, let me show you it/them" pictures are accompanied by cats apparently presenting or offering an object. Another common lolcat displays a cat with a specific look, which is described by adjective, and the text, "[adjective] cat is not [adjective]"[citation needed] or "Your offering pleases [adjective] cat." A version of this is also stated as "adjective cat is not amused", or "[adjective] cat has run out of [adjective]" (when the cat in related picture seems to be feeling the opposite of the adjective used to describe it.)

Example:


Or my personal favorite:


Be on the lookout for new lolmattz in the new year. Of course, reader submissions are more than welcome.

The Scandal Breaks

International Scandal: Don Cheadle Planned Darfur Genocide To Create Film Role

He Blue Himself

Papa Smurf Lives!

Something Old, Something New

If you're going to dig up Nemoy's embarrassing past, you've got to post Shatner's:

Make sure you at least skip ahead to the awesome late 70's special effects toward the end.

And now, taking the mashup concept one step further, a fresh cover:

Ballad of Bilbo Baggins

Unlike Bex, I never know which internet videos are "fresh" and which have already made the rounds. Since the following hilarious clip was posted a couple of years ago it's very possible that you've already seen it:



The song was actually recorded by Leonard Nimoy on his 1968 release The Two Sides of Leonard Nimoy. The video was originally aired in 1967 on the variety show Malibu U. My questions: was the dance completely ad-libbed, or did a professional choreographer actually tell them to move like that? Were the girls supposed to be hobbits, or are they Bilbo's dwarf companions? Why do their buttons say "Hobbits Unite"? What does that even mean? And where I can get one of those awesome sweatshirts?

It's Back: Lost.

Between October Road and Lost, we're in a new golden age of television.

LOLMATTZ

Vote Nietzsche

Ryan Adams Doesn't Endorse, He Tells You How It's Gonna Be

Look, I know you're all sick of Tom and I talking about October Road. But if we can't convince you to watch the show of a lifetime, maybe noted Road fan and slightly overrated musician Ryan Adams can...via his inspirational new music video featuring the show's cast:

Big Cat's Big Week

Feel like you haven't seen Big Cat around much in the last couple of weeks? So do we. For a while there, we were getting a little worried about ol' Carrotface. Poor Guinness, filled with the new and confusing emotions of adolescence, began to develop abandonment issues related to her absentee father. Unable to deal with these strange feelings, she acted out by pooping on things. So did Richard and I.

But rest assured that Tom's not trying to avoid you - it's because he's been busy writing finals and making braille textbooks available to blind college students (seriously). And his hard work is finally paying off. Not only is he done with school for the next month, he was was recently awarded a distinguished fellowship that only goes to 4 Republican congressional staffers a year. Four staffers...out of 120 offices.

So the next time you stop by Pocomoke, make sure to greet Tom with a big smile and a hearty slap on the back. The Big Cat has earned a little catnip.

The Pocomoke Christmas List: Addendum

I believe our previous post on our Christmas wishlist neglected the newest resident of Pocomoke (and I don't mean the family of Romanian immigrants we're renting Matt's room to): Guinness. For those of you looking for something get Tom's feline, might I suggest a stylish wig.

Zero Punctuation (NSFW)

My friend 49 showed my this series a few months ago and I'm hooked. Basically, it's a fast talking video game review show with an irreverent sense of humor and hilarious flash animations. I've embedded the review for guitar hero 3 below because it has mass appeal, but who's even mildly into videogames should check out the the rest of them here.

A Growing Epidemic

"I'll Take Cardiac Arrest for $400, Alex."

Regular Hock-readers will recall that last weekend, J.G. and his loyal aide-de-camp Bex traversed to Pittsburgh for J.G.'s audition for the hit television quiz show, Jeopardy.

But no sooner did J.G. pass the audition and get placed in the contestant pool (huzzah!) that we get this troubling news from the great state of California!


Alex Trebek has heart attack

LOS ANGELES, California (CNN) -- Alex Trebek, the long-time host of the popular television quiz show "Jeopardy," suffered a minor heart attack at his home Monday night.

Trebek, 67, was recovering at a local hospital, and it was not clear when he would be released, a representative of the show said. He is expected to resume taping the show in January.

The representative added that Trebek did not have any previous known condition that would have led to the heart attack.

Trebek, 67, is a native of Sudbury, Ontario. He has hosted "Jeopardy!" since 1984.

Prior to becoming "Jeopardy!" host, he served as emcee for a number of game shows, including "High Rollers," "The Wizard of Odds" and "Battlestars."


All of us here at Pocomoke wish Alex a speedy recovery so that he can resume taping and call up J.G. to compete ASAP!

Know Your Pocomoke: Answers Revealed

Behold the answers to this week's KYP!

1. Matt's old apartment was in the Cavendish, a.k.a the Cav. My favorite thing about the place was that for a while there he was using an old Coors Light can as a TV antenna. Classic Old Bear.

2. We'll accept Lil' G. The specific answer I was looking for was "Mr. Bitey." Other possible responses include Garbage, Special Agent Jack Bauer, and Pooper III.

3. Namita's research was impressive. But Tom and I did not attend the presitigious Langley School (known locally as Little Langley). We went to Spring Hill Elementary, home of the Spring Hill Panthers. Our newspaper was therefore named "Paw Prints."

I do have to print a retraction here: Tom was the sports editor of Paw Prints, not the editor-in-chief. However, he later served as editor-in-chief of his creatively-named middle school newspaper, the Middle School Times.

Lord of the Jeopardy: The Fellowship of J.G. and Bex

Many of you already know that Pocomoke native, J.G., has been invited to audition for Jeopardy in person this weekend. And we're not talking about children's Jeopardy... this is the real deal.

Much like Frodo and Sam in The Two Towers, J.G. and his loyal sidekick Bex set out in sleet and freezing rain this afternoon for the mythical city of Pittsburg in the great state of Pennsylvania.

Aside from dangerous conditions, what other perils await them as they enter into the industrial mecca of Pittsburg? Only time will tell.

Keep your eyes on the Hock-N-Blog for the latest updates on our two adventurers!

And, in the meantime, they might do well to heed the following advice:

Win At Yelling

As we all know, about a year ago our very own Lil' Kitten joined a gym and became Big Cat. Except Big Cat didn't really get that big. In fact, he's still pretty much the same size. Which makes one wonder; what is he doing wrong? I've heard rumors that he accidentally got a year membership to a turkish bathhouse instead of a gym and is too embarrassed to admit it. But being the consummate optimist I am, I prefer to think that he's just drinking too many protein shakes and not enough of this:


And yes, this is a real product. I believe the video is from the same people who brought you Powerthirst

Know Your Pocomoke

Christmas is in the air, the first snows of winter are on the ground, and the house smells of rich pine (and, to a lesser extent, cat droppings). Here's this week's KYP quiz:

1. Before moving to Pocomoke, Matt had a pretty sweet setup in Pentagon City. Name his apartment building, and feel free to share your favorite memory of the place.

2. By now you've heard about our newest roomate, Guinness (see below if not). But of course no one gets to use their real name at Pocomoke. What is her nickname?

3. Name the elementary school newspaper of which Tom once served as editor-in-chief. Subquestion: is it appropriate to put "Editor-in-Chief, Elementary School Newspaper" on one's resume, or does Tom need to make some updates?

As always, answers to come later this week.

Meet Our New Roommate

It seems like every time Ol' Bear leaves town, we pick up a new roommate.

In April, James wandered his way in off the streets and we just didn't have the heart to send him back out in the cold.

And now, I'd like to introduce you to our new roommate: Guinness (the cat, not the beer).

Guinness is 7 weeks old, hails from Harrisonburg, Virginia, and enjoys stalking inanimate objects and sleeping.

Big Cat and Carolyn picked her up Saturday evening and she made the treacherous journey to Pocomoke on Sunday.

She's settled into Pocomoke nicely and now acts like she owns the place.

High-Five

One More Thing For the Christmas List:

The Pocomoke Christmas List: First Edition

Christmas may be a time to count our blessings, but it's also a time to obsess about all the stuff that's missing from our lives. And even though we have it pretty good here at Pocomoke, there are still plenty of things that could make our house even better. Here's a list of what we're wishing for this Christmas (subject to updates from now until December 25th):


-Nintendo Wii, and plenty of gauze and neosporin for all the video game-related fistfights that will inevitably ensue
-For Landlord Joe to fix the upstairs toilet
-A Red Ryder BB gun with a compass in the stock, and this thing which tells time
-Anything from Sharper Image
-For the writers' strike to end before the new season of Lost begins
-Another "Die Hard" sequel
-For a good bar to open in Westover so we don't have to risk our lives by going to the Forest Inn
-For some kindly intruder to break into our house and finally hang up the dartboard
-A hula hoop
-To never, ever see the John Mellencamp "This is Our Country" Chevy commercial again
-A razor and shaving cream for Tom
-More Mark Ruffalo in our lives
-For all our readers to have a safe and happy holiday season (but we'll take the Wii if we only get one)